i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize