Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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