i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
The uberlube is also flammable
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Randomize
