Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize