summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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