Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
