this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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