I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
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