i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
