I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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