So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize