would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
