She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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