Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
