Your tits are I can't wait for
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
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I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
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It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.