its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
