Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
