Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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