we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
