Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.

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(248): View more from Michigan

And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.

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(818): View more from California

Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(609): View more from New Jersey

Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny

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(206): View more from Washington

Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.

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(207): View more from Maine

he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem

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(425): View more from Washington

Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero

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(636): View more from Missouri

It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?

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