I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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