We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
