Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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