If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
last night I used snow as a chaser
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