I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Randomize
