I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
