You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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