:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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