i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
