I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Well I just put wine in my tea
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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