I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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