so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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