mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
