is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
