the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
