What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
