I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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