oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize