it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
