Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
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