And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize