3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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