I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
