So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
