dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize