Did you just see the Batmobile???
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize