i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My dick has a subreddit
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
