Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  the recession has oofficially hit my standards.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): the recession has oofficially hit my standards. http://tfl.nu/xl9z
  Replies (5) Good night (686) Bad night (1830) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time. http://tfl.nu/80vr
  Replies (5) Good night (1927) Bad night (474) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin http://tfl.nu/0a0z
  Replies (14) Good night (827) Bad night (2073) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner. http://tfl.nu/otz7
  Replies (36) Good night (16592) Bad night (753) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required. http://tfl.nu/6ko6
  Replies (6) Good night (4962) Bad night (813) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went. http://tfl.nu/jkvp
  Replies (14) Good night (4814) Bad night (1010) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  i said good morning to each one of his abs personally

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): i said good morning to each one of his abs personally http://tfl.nu/1e7y
  Replies (11) Good night (6789) Bad night (854) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (478): View more from Georgia

  I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (478): I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been. http://tfl.nu/xper
  Replies (3) Good night (800) Bad night (2596) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking http://tfl.nu/uwdq
  Replies (4) Good night (2017) Bad night (836) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails. http://tfl.nu/6r5a
  Replies (8) Good night (817) Bad night (2501) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home. http://tfl.nu/9c0m
  Replies (4) Good night (956) Bad night (1952) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night. http://tfl.nu/sz8o
  Replies (9) Good night (1516) Bad night (673) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar! http://tfl.nu/gi23
  Replies (3) Good night (586) Bad night (262) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms http://tfl.nu/9llu
  Replies (4) Good night (272) Bad night (685) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing http://tfl.nu/4jwd
  Replies (0) Good night (288) Bad night (184) Order T-Shirt

Randomize