google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
