so explain again why im purple
no
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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