Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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